#ConfessionsOfAnUpsetMama #CreateYourNow #TodaysParent

Proverbs 18:13 tells us, “To answer before listening — that is folly and shame.”

And yet how often do we jump in before they’ve even finished their sentence?

Maybe you’ve been the mama who interrupts. The mama who hears the first three words and thinks she already knows the rest. The mama who turns a conversation into a coaching session nobody signed up for. And every time you do, you watch your child pull back just a little. Not because they don’t love you, but because they don’t feel heard.

Your child doesn’t need you to fix it. They need you to sit with them in it.

When they come to you with something heavy, something confusing, something that doesn’t even seem like a big deal to you but is their whole world right now — the most loving response isn’t an answer. It’s attention.

James 1:19 says, “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.”

Quick to listen. That means listening comes first. Before the advice, before the correction, before the “well, when I was your age” — we listen.

Please hear your child.

The K.I.S.S. ~ H.E.A.R. your child!

How do you interact with your children typically now?

So how do we get better at this? How do we shift from fixing mode to listening mode?

H — HOLD space without filling it. When your child comes to you, resist the urge to immediately respond. Let there be silence. Let them gather their thoughts. Your quiet presence tells them, “You are safe here, and what you have to say matters.” Hold the space open even when it feels uncomfortable.

E — ENGAGE with eye contact and full attention. Put the phone down. Close the laptop. Turn your body toward them. These small physical shifts communicate something words never could — that they are your priority in this moment. Engagement is not passive; it is an intentional act of love.

A — ACKNOWLEDGE their feelings before offering perspective. Before you say a single word of advice, name what you see. “That sounds really frustrating.” “I can tell this matters to you.” “That must have been hard.” Acknowledgment doesn’t mean agreement — it means you see them. And being seen is one of the deepest needs of the human heart.

R — RESPOND with questions, not solutions. Instead of jumping to “here’s what you should do,” try “what do you think you want to do?” or “how did that make you feel?” Questions invite them deeper into their own process. They build critical thinking, confidence, and trust — and they keep the door open for more conversations to come.

Mama, I know it’s hard. Every part of you wants to jump in and shield them from the hurt. But some of the most powerful moments in your child’s life will be the ones where you said nothing at all — and they felt everything.

Your children are not looking for a perfect parent. They are looking for a present one. One who shows up, sits down, and says with everything in her, “I’m here. I’m listening. And I love you.”

“Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!“