The pressure to “make it perfect” can lead to disappointment, and the pile-up of tasks leaves little room for patience. Add busy family schedules, travel stress, and well-meaning but intrusive advice from relatives, and it’s no surprise couples sometimes reach their breaking point.

But it doesn’t have to be that way.

Christmas is more than gifts and glitter; it’s an opportunity to root your marriage in grace and a deeper love that withstands storms. It’s a chance to reboot your connection—to fall in love all over again by focusing on what really counts: kindness, presence, and intentionality.

Love isn’t found in grand gestures alone. It’s found in the small, daily choices to be kind, to listen, and to nurture one another. It’s about making the space to truly see your partner beneath the noise of the holidays. When couples remember this, the season shifts from a source of stress to a wellspring of hope.

The K.I.S.S. ~ Shift your season by connecting!

Here’s how you can deepen your connection during this busy season—and beyond.

1. Choose Grace Over Grievance

“The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love.” —Psalm 103:8

In the frenzy of the holidays, imperfections become magnified.

• Your partner forgets to pick up a gift
• Tension mounts over family logistics
• Frustration bubbles under the surface

But falling in love again starts with choosing grace instead of grudges.

Remember, grace isn’t ignoring problems; it’s opening space for healing. When tempers flare, pause and breathe. Instead of escalating conflict, say to yourself: “I’m choosing love over being right.”

An original truth to hold on to: Love grows when we give it the room to breathe, not the weight to suffocate.

Extend forgiveness freely—because holding on to small hurts only sinks the connection.

2. Create Meaningful Moments Amid the Madness

“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.” —Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

Connection isn’t just about big displays; it’s built on small actions. Whether wrapped up in holiday errands or catching the end of a Christmas movie, these little moments create “sticky” bonds that glue hearts together.

Think beyond gifts:

• Share a quiet walk after decorating
• Cook a meal together
• Write down what you appreciate about each other.

These acts signal, “You matter to me,” stronger than the most expensive present.

As I often say, “Life gets messy, but love is built in the moments you’re both fully present—even if it’s just for five minutes.”

Seek those pockets of genuine connection every day.

3. Speak Words That Nurture and Build

“Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.” —Proverbs 16:24

Words carry enormous power in relationships, especially during stressful seasons. It’s easy to default to criticism or complaints. But what if you flipped the script? What if your words became the bridge, not the wedge?

Make a habit of sincere compliments, encouragement, and affirmations. Tell your partner what you love about them, what you notice they do, and how they make your life better. Speak life into your marriage.

“Your voice can either deepen love or drain it—choose to speak as if your words water a garden.” ~ Kristianne Wargo

“Whether you’re together in the same room or miles apart this Christmas, opportunities to love are woven into your daily actions.” ~ Kristianne Wargo

Those connections, small yet profound, make life sticky. And a sticky marriage is one that lasts.

So this season, leave behind the holiday chaos as an excuse. Instead, let Christmas be the season you fall in love all over again—rooting your marriage not in perfection, but in grace, presence, and heartfelt words. That’s the best kind of gift there is.

“Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!“