And as much as we want to ignore the truth, we must acknowledge the elephant in the room.

Dominance in marriage is a real thing.

What’s interesting, though, is how the dominance is handled between husband and wife.

• Are you the one who enables the dominant personality because you are not stepping up in the role you need to claim and own?
• Or are you the dominator that wants everything one way and is close-minded to any other options or discussions?

There isn’t much left besides those two.

But if you agree that marriage is a commitment between two equals, why should any one person dominate?

Now, I get all the strengths and weaknesses and working within our genius zones. But in all reality, are you really thinking about that when you are in a heated battle trying to win the discussion?

Heck no!

You want to be right. You want to prove a point. You want it your way. Nothing else is acceptable.

Or is it?

A beautiful marriage is built on a foundation that has boundaries for not one person, but for both to follow.

Surrender the power.

The K.I.S.S. ~  Surrender the power!

The power struggle or dominant personality is real in marriages. It can become such a thorn in everyday marriages that couples work more to stay away from the power drive, away from the confrontation. You should not settle in marriage. You want to compromise with compassion.

Tune out the sound system of WIIFM – what’s in it for me!

You have got to surrender the power. You do this by…

1. Delight in your spouse’s success. You need to celebrate your spouse when he/she succeeds. You don’t always have to be right. You don’t always have to have all the answers. Let your spouse shine, too, in the marriage.
2. Stand down or stand up. This is where you surrender your power. If you are the one who dominates the marriage, then stand down making room for your spouse to stand up. Or if you’re the quieter spouse, stand up so your spouse can stand down. Both spouses are responsible for equal partnership. So no matter what side of the personality you hold, you still are responsible. There’s no talking yourself out of it.
3. Take it to bed. Some things are best in bed. Setting time aside to focus on what you all need as a couple is essential. And having the time to do that might need to happen behind closed doors in the bedroom. Now don’t do it when you are exhausted, mad, or frustrated. Keep an open mind to explore all sides, then make a decision and come to a conclusion.

Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. ~ Romans 12:10 NIV

Love each other with genuine affection and take delight in honoring each other. ~ Romans 12:10 NLT

CHALLENGE: Instead of fluffing your own feathers, what can you do to encourage and honor your spouse?

“Be present. Be incredible. Be YOU!!!“