You can call it what you want. But be honest. You can’t and won’t like everything your spouse likes.

You will definitely have conflict and disagreements. In fact, you will even want to leave the room a few times just because you aren’t interested in the subject at hand.

This is all normal!

No marriage has a conflict-free relationship. And if you did, I would question the honesty of the marriage.

If you love, if you care, there will be disagreements. There will be conflicts. You won’t want to listen to everything your spouse says.

But is that all bad?

WOAH! What?!?

How could we even question such a thing? Isn’t a couple suppose to be on the same page?

“A healthy marriage requires differences.” ~ Kristianne Wargo

And with any difference comes conflict. But the conflict doesn’t have to be the center of attention. That’s where we have it all wrong.

We make conflict the subject of our success in marriage.

If we don’t have conflict, our marriage is strong and stable. We’re successful.

But if we do have conflict, we are lacking in much (love, strength, kindness, empathy). Therefore, we are less or unsuccessful.

When you don’t see eye to eye, you have to look beyond the “value” (or the success) of marriage. Because otherwise, you are defining it by whether or not you have disagreements or disinterests.

Everybody does. So is everybody’s marriage a failure?

NO!!

When you don’t see eye to eye, live by what you value.

The K.I.S.S. ~ Live by what you value!

You are not putting one person above the other. You are simply choosing a direction with how to carry yourself as a person.

1. Lead with respect. Do what is best for you with concern for your spouse. I need to do what’s best for me, but aware and understanding for my spouse.
2. Listen to your spouse’s point of view with no judgment. Your spouse may or may not choose to voice his/her opinion. You don’t have to agree, but you can listen.
3. Love openly and unconditionally. Don’t close the door because you can. Giving them the benefit of the doubt. When we don’t get what we want (or what we expect), we want to slam the door in their face. Don’t shut them out.

This becomes a healthy response to a sometimes negative situation.

Disagreements and conflicts will find you. Just don’t let them define you!